When my great-grandson was around six or seven, he would come to me and say, “Just so you know,” and then tell me about his latest computer game or TV show and what the characters were doing. So I’m stealing that line from him.

I’m sure I have felt the same emotions that all of you have felt during this strange, profound time. However, I have decided to begin looking at events in a more positive way. I believe this chaotic time is forcing us to stop, reflect, look honestly at ourselves and, hopefully grow. I read somewhere that our species is actually evolving. Lordy, lordy, wouldn’t that be wonderful.

I feel a little more positive every day. Not because of the news, but because of the people I’m hearing or reading about. There are so many good souls out there. Many are going through difficult times and are trying to understand what it is that they are supposed to learn. I admire that.

I’m doing the same and have come up with a few lessons for myself. I’m working on not worrying about others but rather praying for them. I’ve stopped going to the worse-case scenario and what I will do if . . . .  And I’m choosing to surrender and trust. I could go on, but I’m sure you get the point. Each of us has his or her own lessons, as well as, the potential to grow maybe even evolve.

Wanted to update those of you who have been reading my blogs on where I am at the moment.

Just so you know.

Posted by libbygrandy at 12:04 PM EDT

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I know how you all are feeling. I’m feeling the same way. Instead of detailing those negative emotions, however, I want to focus on some of positive aspects of this profound time. Although I hurt for those who are experiencing pain and suffering, especially if it is at the hands of others, I also am seeing inspirational moments of caring and kindness. And I, personally, feel a new oneness with others, even strangers.

We tend to look for someone or something to blame when things are not going well. When I go that route, however, I never feel better. When I find my place of peace, hope returns.

Finding that place is different for each person. My way may not be your way but just choosing to go that route brings an acceptance of the moment and positive intention for the future. In my novel, the character Lydia, says: “Find that place of stillness inside where all things are possible. Surrender and trust. Surrender is not giving up. It is the spiritual opposite. It allows things out of a person’s control to work out.”

I believe that if we choose to work together, regardless of beliefs or politics, we can find a way through this turbulent time to a better world.

Link to novel, Lydia:

http://ow.ly/heAg30kxmJx

Posted by libbygrandy at 10:34 AM EDT

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There is a time for everything. When we have a passionate feeling, we want to do something right away. If the emotion we are feeling is anger, that is definitely not the time to act. From a calm and more peaceful place, we can act in a way that makes a positive difference.

A lot of anger exists in the world today. I feel it myself at times. Often it is necessary in order to take the first step in an action that is needed. More often it is a deterrent to wise action. In a moment of fervent emotion, we need to find a place of calm and hopefully wisdom. Even from that place, I never argue politics with certain friends, because we are not going to change one another’s mind. At least not in the moment. (I secretly pray that they are enlightened. Lol)

Even if the feeling is compassion, there is the right time to express it. I sometimes get a sudden feeling to call someone. Usually the first words they speak are: I was just thinking about you. I love that because it offers proof that we are indeed connected in ways we may not understand but are valid. The conversation evolves from that loving place, and it becomes clear what I should say or not say.

If we control our emotions and work together, I believe we will build a better world, personally and globally. But we must be thoughtful, as there is a time for everything.

Posted by libbygrandy at 5:18 PM EDT

Updated: Monday, 8 June 2020 6:56 PM EDT

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This is a time like no other. Unfortunately, I have no words to describe what I feel about it. To use the word “positive,” as in positive outcome doesn’t seem right, since so many are suffering and even dying. However, I keep feeling that a better world is going to evolve from this difficult time. Every day on TV or FaceBook I see people helping others. I see courage and sacrifice. I sense a “oneness” that I didn’t before.

I have friends on both sides of the political spectrum, but we don’t discuss issues. We just agree we need to work together or things will get worse. Which they will for a few months because of the virus. But at some point, I believe we’ll find answers, hopefully sooner rather than later.

I have had “feelings” all my life that others didn’t believe or understand. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the words, “Well, that’s what you told me. I’ll trust you the next time I get into a funk.”

So if you’re in a funk, trust me, a better world is evolving.

Posted by libbygrandy at 10:30 AM EDT

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I’m enjoying California’s “stay at home” edict. For the first time in my life, I don’t have to think about what to wear when I go out or, for that matter, what I look like, period. Actually, with my blue mask, I tend to look like a bank robber.

I’m not in pajamas but in what they call a house dress. I feel comfortable, sitting on our front porch in it, waving at people walking by. They don’t notice that I don’t have mascara on. They just wave back. I admit I still put on lipstick and comb my hair. Speaking of hair, it’s growing taller and taller. I rather like it. Some people my age have thinning hair. Not me. Lots of white hair.

What is the point of this rambling? I’m trying to focus on what I’m grateful for, rather than . . . . well, you know.

I’m also finding things to laugh about. For example, I was so proud of myself for ordering toilet paper weeks ago, feeling assured that there would be no lack of toilet paper in our house. It came yesterday. A small package arrived in the mail. Inside were six reams of toilet paper, four inches by three inches. So cute. And so small. My daughter and I couldn’t stop laughing.

Hope that you all are focusing on your blessings, too. And if you need a little bit of toilet paper, and I do mean a little bit, give me a call. lol

Posted by libbygrandy at 12:35 PM EDT

Updated: Thursday, 30 April 2020 12:38 PM EDT

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Hope. A fragile emotion these days. It is easy to feel hopeless when we turn on the news. This is a strange and difficult time for so many people. However, giving in to despair should not be an option. 

Positive, creative energy is powerful in itself. I also am an advocate for prayer. A friend who has had an horrendous time with her ailing husband told me that she could actually feel the thoughts and prayers that I sent her every day. (He’s doing better.)

Empathy is admirable but only feeling the emotional pain of others doesn’t help them. There may be nothing we can physically do, but listening and letting people know they are in our thoughts and prayers can make a difference. After my husband died, I received so much loving support from friends, family and even strangers. It gave me strength to get through each day. Like my friend, I could feel their love. 

If enough good souls regain faith and hope and believe we are going to get through this profound time and create a better world, that creative energy may actually make it happen. 

One can only hope.

Posted by libbygrandy at 12:08 PM EDT

Updated: Saturday, 25 April 2020 12:11 PM EDT

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I have hesitated to write a blog because I’m as confused and uneasy these days as everyone else. Then I remembered that I started writing blogs to let people know they aren’t alone in regard to their feelings. So here I am.

I have sensed for a while that this is a time of transition. What I didn’t anticipate is that the transition would be so profound and uncomfortable, emotionally. The virus has shaken everyone to the core. 

Hunkering down has not been a problem for me. I love quiet time to think, write, pray. This is a first-time experience for many people, however. People live such busy lives that alone time is alien to them. Until now. What they learn about themselves and others during this time may be surprising and revealing. 

On my website I have an article under Inspiration Stories entitled, We Always Have a Choice. Self-pity or gratitude. Fear or trust. The mind can’t hold two thoughts simultaneously. When we choose gratitude and trust, a certain peace comes. 

The title of a manuscript that I will publish one day is, “The End is the Beginning.” 

That is what I believe about this profound time. 

But what do I know.  Lol

http://www.libbygrandy.com/

Posted by libbygrandy at 8:07 PM EDT

Updated: Monday, 6 April 2020 8:14 PM EDT

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I have been thinking about my family (most of whom have died) and laughing to myself. Why laughing? I mean death isn’t a laughing matter, right? I’ll let you all decide.

     Last summer everyone in my family was at my house. There were many young people, and I was suddenly inspired to talk to them about life. So I made them sit down in the living room and listen to me. What I wanted to do was reassure them that growing old is not something to be dreaded. That, in many ways, it is freeing, in the sense you don’t feel like you have to please everyone. Or worry about your family as, if you’ve done your job as mother and grandmother, everyone is able to handle their own challenges. They just need your loving support and trust.

     Anyway, that was my goal. However, I made a poor choice of words for my first sentences.  I said, “All right, guys, this is what I want to tell you. You are going to grow old and die.” There was a stunned silence and then my twenty-four-year old, granddaughter, Kristan, said. “Thanks Mamie, that’s very inspirational.” When the laughter finally died down, I continued on a more positive note.

     I come from two large families. The O’Flaherty clan had three girls and six boys, the Stoner family had six girls and one boy, my father. Except for two, they lived to be old and relatively healthy. I find reassuring that most also retained clear minds until they “went home.” My Uncle Dan lived to be 99 and after a stroke, he was comatose for several months. He wasn’t suffering, but the family didn’t understand why it was taking so long. Another aunt was with Hospice for five months, bedridden but in no pain. I would visit the hospital every day, go to her bedside and ask, “How are you doing, Aunt May?” and she would say, in a gentle voice, “Just waiting.” When the doctor called me at work to tell me she had finally died, I heard myself say, “Are you sure?”

     When I asked my Aunt Maude why it had taken both so long to die, she matter-of-factly said, “You can’t count on old people to die.”

     You now know what to say when I’m 105 and still blogging.

http://ow.ly/heAg30kxmJx

Posted by libbygrandy at 11:10 AM EST

Updated: Wednesday, 26 February 2020 11:33 AM EST

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I’ve sat with a number of people during their last hours, and it has been inspiring rather than depressing, often because of their last words. I remember one said, “Thanks for everything.” A friend told me her mother said, “I’m so happy.”

There is also an unexpected emotion when someone dies. It’s not logical as we intellectually know that eventually everyone dies, but we still often feel surprised when it actually happens. We tend to wonder, “How can so and so not be here anymore?” It’s more of a feeling than a thought.

Perhaps we feel that way because they still exist, just not in the physical world. I’ve talked to many people who have “heard” from loved ones after they died. I can totally relate. There is also the feeling that they are still close, a feeling that I really don’t have words for.

If any of you have similar experiences one day and worry that you may be going crazy, get in touch with me. We can happily be crazy together. Happy, because it is the kind of loving feeling that is very comforting as well as reassuring, in the sense that perhaps the truth is—one day when we are dead and gone, we won’t really be gone.

Here is a poem I wrote entitled “From One Who Has Gone On”

Yesterday I was here

to hold you in my heart.

Today I still am near

although we are apart.

There is the thinnest veil

through which you cannot see.

But if you could, your heart would sing

because you would—see me!

I have gone on ahead

to where we all began.

You once were where I am now

and will be once again.

So cry your tears of loss

for days that now are gone.

But one day you will understand

and sing a joyful song.

http://ow.ly/heAg30kxmJx

Posted by libbygrandy at 12:04 PM EDT

Updated: Tuesday, 30 July 2019 12:20 PM EDT

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As many of you know, it has been a rather difficult time for me, but the love and support of everyone has helped me arrive at an “okay” place. Except in one area—the news. I wake up feeling relatively calm, and then I make the mistake of turning on the TV and very different feelings fill my mind and heart.

What are those feelings? Depending on the day, they are too often anger and despair. Now I’m not an angry person. You have to push me pretty far to make me truly angry. Mainly because feeling angry makes me unhappy. And I seldom have feelings of despair. Sadness, of course, worry bordering on fear, yes. But despair—not that often and not for that long.

I refuse to believe that this is the “new normal,” but neither is it the “old normal.” I see people on TV exhibiting hatred, unkindness, lack of civility, etc. Apparently these people have always been out there. I just never had to see them. I certainly never had to interact with them.

I was raised in a loving family, surrounded by caring people. They didn’t always agree on things, but they treated one another with respect. The men in my family were honorable and protective. Believe it or not, I don’t remember hearing a cuss word growing up. I’m sure they were muttered when I wasn’t around, but those words weren’t spoken in front of women or children.

By now, I’m sure you are thinking that I’m hopelessly old-fashioned. That’s all right with me if it means caring for others, helping others and not upsetting others, even if I don’t agree with them.

So what do I do after I turn off the TV and the news? I focus on family, friends, and gratitude for the blessings in my life.

And I remind myself that “this too will pass” and hopefully lead to a better world if we work together in a civil, thoughtful way.

But Lordy, Lordy (as we say in the south when we can’t think of anything else to say).

http://ow.ly/heAg30kxmJx

Posted by libbygrandy at 1:26 PM EDT

Updated: Monday, 30 December 2019 9:57 PM EST

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